Authors Holly Peterson and Ali Wentworth have been friends since nursery school — navigating high school boys, semi-grown-up men, childbirth and parenting mishaps side by side. Here, Peterson questions her lifelong pal on pregnancy cravings, disciplining kids and postcoital bliss.
Photography by Marili Forastieri
What’s the biggest parenting disagreement you have with your husband?
Discipline. We both think the other doesn’t discipline enough, but the reality is that neither of us is a good disciplinarian. Basically we both threaten, then we don’t follow through. “Okay,” we say, “you’re being sassy, so there’s no television tonight.” Then, “You just talked like that again? I’m only going to tell you one more time, no television after dinner!” Then, “Okay, more sassy talk, final warning…” Cut to: They’re both watching television all night.
Did you like being pregnant?
I hated every minute. I threw up all my internal organs, and was hooked up to an IV bag because of constant dehydration — even had to keep it attached in the shower. I threw up so often that George [Good Morning America anchor George Stephanopoulos] never saw me do anything else during those nine months. One time he came home and I was naked and throwing up all over the carpet, and the dogs were so disgusted with me, they were throwing up, too. George stood at the front door with his briefcase, frozen, with an expression saying, What have I done?
How was the weight gain?
I had the babies. I couldn’t get enough tuna melts while I was breastfeeding. I remember dropping globs of tuna on Elliott’s forehead.
When is parenting most fun?
When I make my kids laugh, like when I kill them with a good fart joke.
Don’t you both have to attend events at night?
I sometimes have to for work, but he rarely goes. On the nights I come home late, he’s always asleep with the girls in our bed, so I sleep in our daughter’s princess canopy bed.
You two met and were engaged eight weeks later — how did you know he was the one?
I knew because I instantly felt comfortable with him — I felt like I’d come home.
When are you happiest with your kids?
In the summer, when my family is all together and we’re watching Jaws. I’m also happiest when I’m around anything involving butter. You know — porn, lobster…
When is marriage most difficult?
When we’re geographically separated, or Kim Kardashian is on Good Morning America.
When is marriage most fun?
Postcoital.
When do you get the most annoyed with your kids?
When they whine. Whining is like a steak knife against a piece of slate. When they do that, I pretend I don’t speak their language.
